Tag Archives: Gandalf

Deep Breath Before the Plunge

In one of my favorite books, The Return of the King, Gandalf, the venerable wizard, and Pippin, the playful but maturing Hobbit, arrive at a major city at the cusp of an enormous battle. Everyone is on edge, waiting for it to start. Gandalf calls it “the deep breath before the plunge”. I’ve been here several times in my life, on the edge of something completely life-changing.

Before I left for college, the first person in my close-knit family to leave home, move to another state, and complete a bachelor’s degree. 

Before I moved overseas, to another country to learn a new, difficult language and be immersed in a new culture. 

Before I moved back to America, not knowing in the least what was next. 

Before I got married, choosing to trade singleness for lifelong partnership. 

And now, I sit at the cusp of adopting four children, ages two to seven. I’ve taken lots of deep breaths before this plunge. These quiet moments of preparation before my “normal” is completely turned upside down are precious, and frightening at times.

In the weeks or months leading up to a big change, my heart has a tug of war with itself. I don’t like change, yet God’s given me an adventuring spirit that is willing to go into uncharted territory. All the what-ifs swirl around my head. I am a champion at worst-case-scenarios, which makes for great story-telling, but leads to anxiety in my personal life. It is all too easy to spiral down into fear and despair, long before any difficult thing actually happens. I’ve had moments of panic, wondering what in the world I was thinking when I made this decision. Surely you can’t handle this. It’s too hard. It’s too big. And too uncomfortable. 

And while those things are true of every adventure I’ve embarked on, there is another truth that rings even truer. If God asked me to do this, he will be by my side supplying grace, strength, perseverance, and wisdom to accomplish it every step of the way. This is his plan, not mine. I’m not writing this story, he is. And I must trust the Author. 

Even if nothing of the rest of my life is as I planned, expected or hoped, I will still cry out, “I have no good apart from [God]!” (Ps. 16:2). He is my never-changing Rock of Ages in the midst of the enormous, approaching change. Everything around me will look different in a few weeks, but he is and always will be the same. 

Savior.

Provider.

Faith-giver.

Way-maker.

My Rock and fortress.

My God in whom I trust. 

This leap of faith says nothing about me. I will never be able to look back and boast, “Look at all the amazing things I did.” No. I don’t have any faith in my own abilities. I am weak. I have and will fail. No, all the good in me is God’s work. He get’s all the credit and glory. I’m just a vessel, a clay jar in which he hid his surpassing treasure. He is worthy and he is with me. I’m ready for the plunge. 

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.”

1 Corinthians 4:7

Dragon-Slayer

When I was in college, I had the privilege of babysitting my pastor’s kids. One of my favorite parts was putting them to bed. No, not the fact that they were going to sleep so I could dig into the peanut butter chocolate swirl ice cream in the freezer, but because I told bedtime stories. 

I told the younger girls stories of princesses who had adventures with mermaids and fairies. After goodnight kisses and making sure all the essential blankies were in bed, I went downstairs to the boys’s room to tell their stories. 

Sir Jake and Sir Jimmy were two brave knights who defended their father’s kingdom, learned about teamwork, and fought dragons, trolls, and ogres. I wove in elements of sacrifice, glory, and duty. The knights failed at times, but learned they could always count on their father, the king, because he was the ultimate dragon-slayer. 

In retrospect, I gave much more attention to the boys’ stories, mostly because the girls were younger and didn’t need sweeping plot lines to entertain them. However if I could go back, I would tell similar stories to the girls. Trust in and fight for the Dragon-Slayer. 

Big Picture

The box office successes of The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, Stars Wars, and Game of Thrones shows our culture’s thirst for epic, sweeping adventures that weave together individual characters and events into a grand story. We long to be part of something bigger than ourselves.

In The Lord of the Rings, Frodo and Sam seem small and alone on the journey to destroy the ring in Mount Doom, yet the reader knows that everyone else is working hard for the same end. Frodo and Sam reach Mount Doom because Gandalf and Aragorn draw out the enemy and clear their path. The Ring is finally destroyed, despite Frodo’s succumbing to its power, by Gollum, who wants the ring for himself, but is destroyed along with it. Frodo and Sam were only a piece of the story. A pivotal piece, but a piece nonetheless. 

This resonates with us because we too want to be a part of something bigger than ourselves. Culture tells us that we are enough, that if we look deep down, we’ll find the strength and power we need to be the main character of our own stories. 

However our culture is full of symptoms that this mindset is toxic. Drug use and opioid crises wreak havoc with addiction, abuse, and overdose. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, there are 129 suicides a day. Anxiety and depression are common-place. Sex is cheap and meaningless. When we look to ourselves for meaning and purpose, we only go deeper in our depravity and darkness. 

Our Dragon-Slayer

The good news is that we are part of a bigger story. God created this world out of nothing for his glory. When the first people on the earth, Adam and Eve, chose to disobey God, sin entered the world, and it broke everything. It wrecked our relationship with God, each other, and the world. We were enslaved to our sin and to Satan, the dragon (Rev. 12, 20). 

However God, in his mercy, sent his son Jesus Christ to live the perfect life we could not. He died on the cross in the horrible death that we deserve as just punishment for our sins. Jesus rose again on the third day, conquering death, sin, and the dragon. 

Jesus is our Hero. He offers forgiveness to all who call on the name of the Lord, and eternal life in resurrected bodies after he returns at his appointed hour. 

This is God’s story. A story of hope. A story of love. A story that you could have a part in if you are a follower of Jesus Christ. 

If you are a follower of Jesus, take heart! This darkness will not last, indeed Jesus has already landed the death stroke of the dark dragon (Satan) who rules these lands.

If you don’t know Jesus, I plead with you to come and meet the good God who created you, loves you, and offers you eternal hope and life in Christ Jesus. 

You have a part to play in God’s story. Come and adore the great Dragon-Slayer!