The Secret to Contentment

Are you content? Is your house big enough? Is your work meaningful enough? Are your children good enough? Does your spouse do enough? Do you have enough?

Contentment is an elusive term, and even more of a difficult attitude to cultivate. We can tell ourselves we are content all we want, but deep in our hearts dissatisfaction lurks. We want more.

Search for Satisfaction

To be content is to be satisfied with what one has and not want more or anything else (dictionary.com). Contentment is being thankful for what we have, not always on the lookout for what we don’t. The root of contentment is satisfaction, and when we seek it from the wrong place, we come up empty, dissatisfied, and wanting.

Dissatisfaction is universal, but we Americans are grossly guilty of it. As a culture, we are materialistic, spoiled, and demand the best in all things. “The American Dream” has long represented riches many only dream about. Yet we are still deeply discontent and always looking for the next thing, relationship, or experience to make us happy.

Christians aren’t immune to it either. Dissatisfaction leads us to move from church to church in search of the “perfect” experience. It leads us to gossip about our sisters and brothers to tear them down and build ourselves up. It leads us to jealousy and fake smiles when another receives something we long for. Dissatisfaction leads us to sin.

Paul’s Secret to Contentment

As in all things, Scripture provides us with the tools and knowledge to find and cultivate contentment. In Philippians, Paul thanks the church of Philippi for supporting him financially. However, amid his thanks, he gives us a beautiful nugget on contentment.

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Phil. 4:11-13

Paul didn’t have a cushy life. In fact, much of the American Church would shrink away from the suffering that came with Paul’s obedience to the Lord.

 Five times I received at the hands of the Jews the forty lashes less one. Three times I was beaten with rods. Once I was stoned. Three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I was adrift at sea; on frequent journeys, in danger from rivers, danger from robbers, danger from my own people, danger from Gentiles, danger in the city, danger in the wilderness, danger at sea, danger from false brothers;  in toil and hardship, through many a sleepless night, in hunger and thirst, often without food, in cold and exposure. And, apart from other things, there is the daily pressure on me of my anxiety for all the churches.

2 Cor. 11:24-28

How could Paul, after enduring all those things, say that he was content and satisfied? His secret to contentment is this:

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”.

God isn’t asking us to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and muster up satisfaction all on our own. Like willpower, whatever satisfaction we conjure up for ourselves is fleeting. Popular self-help books tell us to “believe in ourselves” and “you are enough”. Scripture tells us this isn’t true. Only dependence on God and his strength will lead us to contentment in plenty and in need.

Our Ultimate Satisfaction

God offers himself as the key to our ultimate satisfaction and joy. He knew our deepest need, the need for a right relationship with him, and sent his Son Jesus to die on a cross for our sins. He defeated our greatest enemies, sin and death, to give us abundant life in Christ Jesus.

When we follow Jesus, his righteousness is transferred to us. We stand before God pure and clean, and he brings us into a relationship with him as a beloved child. Our greatest need is met in Jesus, therefore no matter what we face in this life, we can be satisfied and content. Our darkest day on earth is the closest we’ll ever get to hell. And not only that, but Paul goes on to say,

And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen.

Phil. 4:19-20

God is a good father who loves to give good gifts (Matt. 7:7-11). He will provide for your needs in his perfect time.

Fight for Contentment

The battle for contentment is difficult, but necessary for Christians. How do we fight? Consider these action steps if you’re struggling to capture elusive contentment:

  • Ask God to show you the root of your dissatisfaction.
  • Repent of any sin that is stemming from your dissatisfaction (control, unbelief, impatience, critical spirit, etc).
  • Remember the Gospel and rest in the knowledge that your deepest need has already been met in Jesus.
  • Pray and ask the Lord to give you his strength to find satisfaction and contentment in your current circumstances.
  • Memorize scripture to fight for contentment when your wandering heart tries to return to dissatisfaction.
  • Share with an accountability partner.

God loves you and wants to satisfy your heart-of-hearts in Jesus Christ. Don’t try to find contentment in your things, relationships, or experiences. He knows you. He loves you. He will satisfy you.

What God hasn’t Promised

During seasons of disappointment and struggle, we can take great comfort in the promises of God. He promises salvation through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. He promised to do and finish the work of sanctification. He promised to never leave us through the deposit of the Holy Spirit.

However there are some things that aren’t promised in the Bible, specifically marriage and children. If you’re struggling with one of these, or know someone who is, you know the ache and brokenness of these unfulfilled desires. 

In the Bible we are told that Jesus, Paul, and others were unmarried. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7 that marriage divides your affections between your spouse and God, but a single man or woman is only concerned about pleasing God.

There are multiple references to barren women (Sarai, Rebekah, Hannah, Elizabeth), and Prov. 30:16 even describes Sheol (hell) as a barren womb. However every Christian can reproduce spiritual children in making disciples. Paul refers to Timothy as a true child in the faith (1 Tim. 1:2).

Good Desires

Both marriage and children are blessings and good desires. Having a good desire is not a sin, but trying to fulfill that desire outside of God’s good boundaries, we fall into idolatry and sin.

C.S. Lewis said in Screwtape Letters “Never forget that when we are dealing with pleasure in it’s healthy and normal and satisfying form, we are, in a sense, on the enemy’s ground”. This fictional demon communicates to his underling an important truth: Satan can’t create pleasure and joy in and of himself, he can only twist God-given desires and pleasures.

Porn and adultery twists the pleasure and intimacy of sex created for marriage. Gluttony morphs enjoying God-given food with God-created tastebuds into worshipping our stomach. Making a spouse and/or children an idol twists these good gifts into destructors of our souls. 

What God has Promised

Whenever anger begins to seep into our thoughts and prayers about an unfulfilled desire, we must immediately reevaluate our hearts. Anger and discontentment are a symptoms that our joy comes not from Christ, but from the things we expect him to give us. 

If we desire a spouse or child more than God, we are idolators. Our hope must be fully and firmly planted in Christ Jesus. On our darkest, hardest days, we can fling all my weight on this promise of God: 

“Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”

Romans 10:9

This is must be our ultimate anchor. This promise is sure and beautiful. Because of the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus, I am saved from my sin and will spend eternity in a resurrected, sinless body with God.

We are also promised everything we need to holy and walk in faithfulness. What a gift!

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. 

2 Peter 1:3-4

Some may not marry. Some may remain childless. But there is coming a day when we will pass into the glory of God in the blink of an eye, and this light momentary suffering will fall away in the beautiful weight of glory that awaits those who follow Jesus (2 Cor. 4:16-18). 

Photo by Tom Swinnen from Pexels

All Things New

Famine in Sudan. An earthquake in Papua New Guinea. War and starvation in Yemen. Bombings in Syria. Wildfires in California. Children die school shootings. A friend dies of cancer. A sister suffers a miscarriage. A desperate man ends his own life. Arguments ends a marriage. Gossip kills a friendship.

Our world is hopelessly broken. Deep down, at its core, humanity and the planet we inhabit are shattered.

Glory Scorned

It wasn’t always like this. In the beginning, God spoke into being everything we know. He created a perfect world and declared every part of it good. Whole. Complete. Lacking nothing. Creator and Creation lived in perfect harmony, and the glory of the Lord was over all the earth.

Pride brought it all crashing down. The serpent tempted Eve to disobey God and she fell for it. She doubted God’s word and ate of the forbidden fruit, giving some to Adam as well. Humanity and creation plunged into the ugly brokenness of sin. God, being just, handed down punishment. A curse was laid over Adam, Eve, the serpent, and all of creation.

Groaning for Glory

Here we are. Post-fall, with millenniums of sin, destruction, and suffering. What hope do we have in this cursed, sinful, fallen world?

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. Romans 8:18

Read that again. The suffering of this world cannot be compared with the glory that is waiting us on the other side of eternity. When you are in the midst of suffering and trial, we have this sweet promise. It’s nothing compared to our glorious future with Christ! Paul wasn’t saying this lightly. He knew suffering intimately (1 Cor. 11:24-28). Yet he said all this couldn’t be compared to our glorious future with Christ. Amen!

 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. Romans 8:19-22

Adam and Eve did not only implicate themselves. They subjected creation to futility, sin, and the curse. “Actions have consequences” my parents often told me while I was growing up, and this had a global effect. The lordship God had given to Adam to rule over the creation was handed over to the serpent for a bite of fruit. Creation groans under the weight of futility. What was created for the glory of God is twisted and torn by sin. It longs for all to be made right.

And it will be made right! Creation will be set free from its bondage to corruption as surely as we will be freed from our sinful flesh! Like a woman giving birth, her moans, screams, and pains are leading to something new.

Glorious Good News

And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Rom. 8:23-14

In the face of disaster, famine, and death, the world says, “If only we could come together and stop hurting one another, everything would be ok”. But we know better. We who walk by the Spirit know that our world and the people in it are broken, deep down, rotten to the core. We too groan in anticipation of the freedom of glory of the children of God (Rom. 8:21). We need to be made new. We need a rebirth to wash all the sin, darkness, and evil from this world.

But God already covered the earth once with water, judging wicked mankind, except for one family. Noah worshipped God, but sin was written in his DNA. Sin lived on. Abraham came and sinned. Moses came and failed. David came and stumbled. Not one of the prophets could live the life of perfection God requires, until he sent his only son, fully God and fully man, Jesus Christ. He lived a perfect life, being tempted in every way but he chose to obey God. He died the death that we deserve, the punishment for our sins, and rose again, defeating death and sin! In Adam all sinned, but in Christ, the true and better Adam, we find life.

 For if, because of one man’s trespass, death reigned through that one man, much more will those who receive the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man Jesus Christ. Romans 5:17

Abundance of grace! Free gift of righteousness! These are yours if you follow Jesus! And if you do not follow Jesus yet, they can be yours! The gift of salvation is open to all who believe. The righteousness of Christ is yours if you trust in Jesus for salvation. Amen, praise God!

Hope for Glory

Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. Romans 8:25

So we hope. We wait. We groan. We walk through the suffering of this life knowing that when Jesus comes back, his Kingdom will be fully ushered in. Every tear wiped away. There will be a new heavens and earth. We will be with God in resurrected bodies, untouched by sin and shame. Yes, we wait with patience, knowing our God is working all things together in his time for his glory and our good (Rom. 8:28).

(Check our my previous articles on Romans 8 here, here, and here. Happy reading!)AllthingsnewRom8:20-21